Our Perfect Place

God has a plan for us all. Some of you sing or are in the band and come every sunday/thursday, some find it hard to come on thursdays or maybe you are just forgotten. Sometimes we feel like we know where we belong. I know I feel that way. It's like we want to tell God how to run our lives. My want is to sing. That is my true heart, but God does not want that for me right now. I want more time so I can be lazy, I want an extra donut every now and then. However God has a perfect place for me. I want friends, I want to bring more people to christ and live a "normal" highschool life. God put me where I am right now and I have to be thankful--even though I have my "ideal" life I want to lead...God is the one in charge. But wherever I go it's horrible I feel so disconnected--so far away even from my closest "friends" even my BEST friend who I tell practically everything to is a jehovah's witness!!! So I can't speak about my religion...which is pretty annoying and my friend Bryan believes in yin/yang, the matrix, grim reaper, and karma. My other friend Colin thinks religion is over rated. And others around me spit on God and I end up conforming to them. I don't spit on God but I hate arguing. I hate fighting. I hate it when I have to stand up for my faith when I'm doing by just saying "Hey, I'm a christian!" This seems so imperfect, but to God this is my "Perfect Place" to be right now.

Love

God has taught me something really important. I never fully understood what love was. Really, I never understood or felt it before. Well yeah, I have felt it but did not know that it was love. I always mess things up and misinterpret what it is. I learned this yesterday when I realized this guy who I thought I loved/liked actually liked someone else. But my other friend, Bryan told me that Colin the guy I thought I liked did love me, but as a friend. When I looked back at all the times he's been for me I just finally understood. It was amazing. I finally understood LOVE!! So I thought I'd just share that with you guys. I've caught up with the devos and my Bible reading and hope to continue doing so. :]

Je suis entré

I have entered finally. Sheesh it took me 10 days...well I've been busy and getting here wasn't very easy. I have a huge project due tomorrow and my best friend is leaving to an independant study program. Which means I will only see him twice a week. I'll try to play catch up a little bit with the devos and get in touch with God. I seem to be drifting away--despite the lack of media. I think Media never was the true problem for me--but priority. I put other things first before God. Media just helped keep me away...now I'm just replacing media time with homework or christian media...it's a step up but... anyway keep me in your prayers as I try to reach closer to God.